Volume I, Treatise VII, Chapter VI

That We Ought not Readily Change the Matter of Our Particular Examen; and How Long Wt Is to be Continued on the Same Subject

Ir is good here to observe, that we ought not easily or lightly change the matter of our examen, sometimes taking one, sometimes another subject; for this would be to go round and round, without advancing; but we must pursue our object to the very goal; and afterwards prepare to pursue another, and then another, with equal constancy. The reason why some reap so little fruit from their examen is, that they make it by starts; so that having pursued an object for ten or fifteen days, or for a month at most, they grow weary, and without having succeeded, they break off and pursue another. This pursuit too they give up, and commence a third, in which they are as unsuccessful as in the two former. If a man that had undertaken to carry a stone to the top of a high mountain, having carried it a considerable way up, should let it fall down again, and should often do the same; it is certain that what pains soever he takes, he will never carry the stone to the top of the mountain. Itis just so with those who embrace one matter for their examen, and before they have finished it, leave it there and take up another, and then another. They can never attain the end they propose to themselves—they fatigue themselves, yet do nothing: “They are always learning,” as the apostle says, “and never attain true knowledge.” (2 Tim. viii. 7.) The affair of perfection is not an affair that is gained by sudden starts—it requires long perseverance—we must take it to heart—we must insist upon it—we must fully resolve to compass it whatever it costs us.

It is a thought of St. John Chrysostom, that as those who dig for a treasure, or a mine of gold or silver, continue to work and to remove every obstacle, till they find the object sought for; so we who seek after true spiritual riches, and the rich treasure of virtue and perfection, must persevere in our search, till we have overcome those difficulties that oppose us, and have found what we seek after. ‘I will pursue my enemies,” says the Royal Prophet, “till I overtake them; and I will not return or leave them, till they are wholly deteated.” (Psalms 17:38) It is by this strong and constant resolution, and not by short sallies, or weak endeavours, that vice is overcome, and virtue obtained.

Let us, then, for a moment inspect the account. How long is it since you commenced your examen? How many objects has it comprised? Had you succeeded in them all you would have been long since perfect; and if there be any one point in which you have not succeeded, why did you leave it off? You will perhaps tell me, it is because you found you failed in it. But do you know why you failed? It is because you changed your design every moment; and because you did not persevere long enough, in order to crown your efforts with success. Moreover, if even while you directed your examen and your attention to one object only, you did not attain it, is it not plain, that without this-examen and this attention, you would be much farther from attaining the object in question? For if he who makes good resolutions is, as we have said elsewhere, liable to fall, how will he be, who either makes none, or at least makes them too late? At all events, three times a-day to resolve against your usual failings must be a curb on you; and though after some time you think you are not more advancedthan you were io the beginning, yet lose not courage, nor leave off what you have undertaken, but humble yourself in your examen, conceive a great confusion for your weakness, and make new resolutions to correct and amend yourself. God permits our failings; he always suffered a Jebusite in the land of promise: that is, he permits some defect or vice to remain in us, that we may resist and fight it; that being thereby fully convinced that of ourselves we can do nothing, and that it is from God alone we must expect strength and succour, we should always have recourse to him, and be always attached to him. And it often happens that from the difficulty we feel in perfectly overcoming our passions, we take greater care, and become more fervent in our spiritual advancement, than if God had presently granted us the victory we begged of him.

But you will ask me, how long then must I continue in my examen upon the same matter? St. Bernard, and Hugo of St. Victor, ask almost the same question: that is, How long we ought to fight any vice? And they answer, that we must fight it till we find we have got so much ground and advantage over our enemy, that as soon as he dares shew himself, we are presently able to overcome him, and subject him to reason. So that we must not stay till the passion is quite extinguished, and till we feel no repugnance at all, for this we must never expect in this life; and Hugo says, this is rather what is bestowed upon angels than men. It 1is sufficient that the passion we propose to ourselves to overcome gives us not much trouble, and that it is of so little hindrance to us, that as soon as it rises we are able easily and certainly to overcome it; and then we may attack other enemies, and take another subject for our examen. Seneca himself teaches us how we are to behave ourselves in this matter. ‘ “We fight,” says he, “against vices, noi that we may entirely overcome them, but that we may not be overcome by them.” (Senec. lib. iii. de ira.) It is not necessary, therefore, that we should wait till the vice is so dead in us, that we feel nothing at all of it; it is sufficient that we have so weakened and so disarmed it, that it is no hindrance to us in the performance of wl:.at conduces to our salvation.

The surest means, notwithstanding, not to deceive ourselves in this, is to confer with our spiritual director, it being in effect one of the chief things in which we stand most of all in need of counsel, There are some things upon which it is sufficient to examine ourselves -only for a short time; and there are others in which an examen of many years would be well employed; “for we should soon become perfect men, if every year we extirpated some one vice or imperfection.” (Thomas 4 Kempis, ]l.i.c. 11.0.5.) And there are other virtues also, in the gaining of which our whole lives would be very well spent; since the gaining one of these alone is sufficient to render us perfect. We have the example of some persons, who having taken one thing only to heart, and made it their whole life the matter and subject of their examen, have very much signalized themselves; one in patience, another in humility, and others in a perfect conformity to the will of God, and in performing all things purely for his sake. We must, therefore, after the same manner, endeavour to excel in some one virtue, persevering in our undertaking till we have completely attained our object. But this, however, hinders us not from interrupting sometimes the examen we have purposed to make every day upon this matter; but on the contrary, it will even be very profitable sometimes to discontinue it for ten or fifteen days, taking for that time the observance of silence—the performing well our spiritual exercises—the speaking advantageously of all persons—the saying nothing that may any ways offend any one—the reforming and amending ourselves in many things of this kind, and in many other faults which spring up, unless from time to time we take care to eradicate them. But after this interruption we must return to our first and chief affair and undertaking, and continue so to - apply ourselves to it, that at length we may accomplish our object.

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