Volume I, Treatise IV, Chapter XIX

Of the Second Sort of Friendship We Ought to Avoid

THeRB is another sort of particular friendship, which differs from the former, because it has a different end; but it is often no less hurtful to the good of a community, and to union and fraternal charity, than the former: and it is when any one, desirous to distinguish himself from the rest of the community, to be advanced in employments, and to be held in consideration and esteem, does unite and join himself to those whom he thinks able to assist him to compass his ends. Cassian says, that the great distempers of the soul are, like those of the body, formed by degrees. Wherefore I shall now explain how this distemper forms itself in the mind of a young religious; how it enters in, and by what means it afterwards comes to corrupt and destroy him. A religious, for example, having ended his noviceship, wherein by the mercy of God he had considerably advanced in virtue, leaves it with a high-esteem and great affection for spiritual things; and thence is sent to a college to complete his studies. From this time, beginning, by means of the friendship he has contracted, to relent in his spiritual exercises, he either lops off part of them, or performs them through custom and negligently; and hence he gathers no fruit whereby to advance himself in perfection. Thus he continues for some time; and as, on the one hand, spiritual arms are wanting to him, because he discharges his duties of piety so ill, and as, on the other, science puffs him up, it happens that the esteem of human learning and reputation gaining on him daily, and increasing insensibly in him, the love of humility and of virtue decreases. Behold this is the gate through which all disorders commonly enter; this is that which diverts young religious from the good way they were in; this is what they cannot take too great precaution against. By little and little they permit the esteem they before had for humility, mortification, obedience, and whatever else regards their spiritual progress, to be destroyed in them. They are daily more and more prejudiced in favour of learning, and of the advantage there is in making themselves learned men—and think it is by this means they must advance and recommend themselves, Afterwards they begin to take measures for attaining the end they propose to themselves; they do all they can to gain the esteem of men of letters; they think only of defending their thesis well, and of coming off with honour on every other public occasion—and aspiring only to things of this sort, they eternally seek occasions of distinguishing: themselves, and perhaps of depreciating the knowledge and learning of their competitors. In fine, going still farther, they endeavour to gain the good will of those they imagine may be able to serve them, and maintain their esteem with superiors, and they contract with them particular friendships, for no other reason than to gain reputation, to advance themselves, and to secure their interest on all occasions,

This is one of the most pernicious friendships that can happen in religious, and which is most opposite to union and fraternal charity. For what can we imagine to be worse than to see ambition creep into our society? And to hear it said, that every one must take care of himself, and help himself the best he can; and that we must govern ourselves in religion as in the world, and consequently must exert ourselves, unless we wish to be forgotten and contemned? God forbid that such discourses as these should ever be held amongst us, and that we should in religion meet with such unhappy persons, who begin to instil such poison as this into the hearts of such as live in all candour and innocency. Sentiments of this kind are far from the spirit of our institute, and from religious simplicity. And it is for this reason that St. Ignatius so strongly recommends to us in his Constitutions, to apply ourselves to solid virtues and spiritual things, and to set greater value on them than on human learning and all other endowments, either natural or acquired. Suffer not yourself, therefore, to be seduced by the old serpent, or to be persuaded that in breaking God’s commandments, and in eating the forbidden fruit, “‘you shall become as gods.” (Genesis 3:5) Take care of believing that hereby you shall be honoured and esteemed, though he tell you so, and promise you ever so much, for he lies as he is wont to do; and if you believe him, you will in the end gain nothing but contempt and confusion. But if you follow the path of virtue, and prefer your spiritual advancement before all other things, you will profit in every respect, because God then pouring down upon you in great abundance all sorts of his graces and favours, you will be better able to acquire at the same time both the perfections you aspire to, and the honour also you look not after. And thus you will be esteemed both by God and man.

We have a great example of this in the third Book of Kings. Here holy Scripture relates that God, appearing to Solomon, bid him ask whatsoever he desired, and he should obtain it. And Solomon having desired the spirit of wisdom and prudence, “this petition,” says the Scriptures, “so pleased our Lord, that he said to Solomon, because you have begged of me a thing of this nature, and have not asked a long life, nor great riches, nor the death of your enemies, but have only desired wisdom, to be the better able to judge, I grant you what you have desired, I give you the spirit of wisdom and understanding, in such a manner that none ever had the like before you, nor shall any person ever have the same after you.” (3 Kings 3:10) But what makes particularly for our purpose is, that the choice which Solomon made in asking wisdom was so pleasing to God that he not only gave him the wisdom he asked, but also other advantages he had not demanded. “TI give you also,” says he, “other things that you did not ask of me, as riches and glory, and these after so ample a manner, that not any king in past ages ever equalled you.” (Ibid.) Thus will God deal with you, if you make a good choice —if you apply yourself to ask true wisdom, that is to say, such virtues as are truly Christian and religious, he will assuredly grant them; because you cannot prefer a more pleasing petition. And he will also do more yet, and procure that you shall be esteemed and honoured by your brethren. We see every day by experience that those that take this way do equally gain both the grace of God and the esteem of men. For the promise of Jesus Christ is infallible: ‘‘He who humbles himself shall be exalted.” (Luke 14:11) The more you shall debase yourself the more you shall be exalted; and glory is annexed to sanctity of life as a shadow is to the body, which shadow never follows you more than when you fly from it. On the contrary, those who nourish and puff themselves up with vainglory, feed like cameleons upon the air, for the more they seek the esteem

and approbation of men the less they obtain it. And it will.

happen that even what they thought would have contributed most to their elevation will serve only to debase them, and they will fall into disgrace by the same means whereby they hoped to have gained esteem and reputation. For they will be presently looked upon as proud and restless persons, who are good for nothing but to trouble the peace of religion; and then entirely to cover them with confusion, nothing more will be wanting than to cut them off as rotten members, lest they should infect and corrupt others.

But to return to our subject, I say, that asin religion we must divest ourselves entirely of all kind of ambition; so we must also divest ourselves of all particular friendships, contracted upon this account. We must not tie our affections to any one in particular, nor give occasion to have it said amongst us: ‘ For my part, I am for Paul—for mine, I am for Apollo, and Iam for Cephas.” (1 Corinthians 1:12) We must not be for one person more than for another; we must adhere to the superior alone—it is with him alone we must unite; as for any other particular union, we are to admit of no such thing. In religion we have nothing to do with godfathers and protectors; we need not pay court to any one, nor insinuate ourselves into their favour by flatteries; and as we did not enter religion to make our fortune but to work out our salvation, so in it we ought to have no other object than this in view. Be a good religious, apply yourself seriously to your duty, and to that which regards the end for which you have renounced and forsaken the world, and you will have no business but what belongs to God and his service. It is only these that can taste peace and comfort in religion. To content and repose the others are strangers, and they themselves feel and confess the truth of these assertions, A religious ought to be ashamed to pass for a man that seeks patrons, and endeavours to insinuate himself into the grace or favour of this or that person, to be supported by them; for it is a sign he feels himself so weak, that he cannot without aid support himself, A house that wants a prop is in danger of falling, and a tree that must be upheld by poles, shows that it is very weak, and has not yet taken deep root in the earth; even so, if you take supporters—if you want people to hold you up, you are still very weak, and very ill grounded in virtue, or even in religion itself. Wherefore Father Acquiviva, general of our society, particularly admonishes our young religious not to seek the support or protection of the seniors; and recommends particularly to these not to take upon them the protection of any person in particular. The seniors, he says, should not wish to be paid court to by those, who stand in need of their interest— nor should they offer their services or protection to others—nor are they to deem it an honour to have many applications made to them; and if but few applications of the sort are made to them, they are not to be offended, nor to imagine, that it is through arrogance or reserve the brothers have neglected or slighted them. They are not upon this account to find fault with a brother, who is so far from being culpable therein, that he deserves to be praised for it, as hereby he evinces that he has that detachment and liberty of spirit, which, we ought to have in religion. To act otherwise, is to live like worldlings, and to govern ourselves by the maxims of the world. But if any one complains of you on this account, he will complain that you are virtuous, and that adhering to the rules of a good religious, you avoid what is opposite to the duties of religion; and God grant they may never have any reason but this to complain of your conduct.

About ReligiousBookshelf.com · A Supernerd Media project