Part III, Chapter XXXVII

Of Desires

Every one knows that we are obliged to refrain from the desire of vicious things, since even the desire of evil is of itself criminal; but I tell you, moreover, Philothea, you must not be anxious after balls, plays, or the like diversions, nor covet honors and offices, nor even visions and ecstasies; for there is a great deal of danger, deceit, and vanity in such things. Desire not that which is at a great distance, nor that which cannot happen for a long time, as many do, who, by this means, weary and distract their hearts unprofitably. If a young man earnestly desires to be settled in some office, before the proper time, what does all his anxiety avail him? If a married woman desires to be a nun, to what purpose? If I desire to buy my neighbor’s goods before he is willing to sell them, is it not a loss of time to entertain this desire? If, whilst I am sick, I desire to preach, to celebrate mass, to visit others that are sick, and perform the exercises of those who are in health, are not all these desires in vain, since it is out of my power to put them in execution? Yet in the meantime these unprofitable desires occupy the place of the virtues of patience, resignation, mortification, obedience, and meekness under sufferings, which is what God wishes me to practise at that time; but we are often in the condition of those who long for cherries in autumn, and grapes in the spring.

I can by no means approve that persons should desire to amuse themselves in any other kind of life than that in which they are already engaged; nor in any exercises that are incompatible with their present condition; for this dissipates the heart, and makes it unfit for its necessary occupations. If I desire to practise the solitude of a Carthusian, I lose my time; and this desire occupies the place of that which I ought to have to employ myself well in my actual state. No, I would not that any one should even desire to have more talents or judgment than he is already possessed of; for these desires are not only useless, but moreover occupy the place of those which every one ought to have, of cultivating the genius he inherits from nature; nor should anyone desire those means to serve God which he has not, but rather diligently employ those which he has. Now, this is to be understood only of desires which totally occupy the heart; for, as to simple wishes, if they be not too frequent, they do no harm whatever.

Desire not crosses but in proportion to the patience with which you have supported those which have been already sent you; for it is presumptuous to desire martyrdom, and not have the courage to bear an injury. The enemy often suggests a great desire of things that are absent, and which shall never occur, so that he may divert our mind from present objects, from which, however trivial they may be, we might obtain considerable profit to ourselves. We fight with the monsters of Africa, in imagination; and, in the meantime, for want of attention, we suffer ourselves to be killed by every insignificant reptile that lies in our way. Desire not temptations, for that would be rashness; but accustom your heart to expect them courageously, and to defend yourself against them when they shall come.

A variety of food, taken in any considerable quantity, overloads the stomach, and, if it be weak, destroys it; overcharge not then, your soul, either with a multitude of worldly desires, which may end in your ruin; or even with such as are spiritual, as they are apt to produce distractions. When the purified soul finds herself freed from bad humors she feels a craving after spiritual things; and, as one famished, she longs after a variety of exercises of piety, mortification, penance, humility, charity, and prayer. Philothea, it is a sign of good health to have a keen appetite; but you must consider whether you can well digest all that you wish to eat. Amongst so many desires, choose, then, by the advice of your spiritual father, such as you can execute at present, and turn them to the best advantage afterwards; God will send you others, which you may also practise in their proper season; and thus you will never lose time in unprofitable desires, but bring them all forth in good order; but as to those which cannot be immediately executed, they should be reserved in some corner of the heart, till their time come. This advice I not only give to spiritual persons but also to those of the world; for, without attending to it, we could not live without anxiety and confusion.

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